Kent Speak Their Name Memorial Quilt

The Kent Speak Their Name Suicide Memorial Quilt Project 2025

The Speak Their Name project stands as a testament to the healing power of community, creativity, and shared grief. Through the creation of this quilt, we have gathered, in workshops, in our homes, alone or with loved ones, to stitch together the fragments of our broken hearts.

Every year in the UK, more than 7,000 people die by suicide. Each loss sends shockwaves through families, friendships, and communities, leaving behind a grief that is as complex as it is devastating.

Suicide bereavement carries not only heartbreak but also the weight of stigma, unanswered questions, and a deep sense of isolation.

For those left behind, the pain is often compounded by doubt and guilt, the persistent thoughts of “What If’s” and “Could I have done more?” Many also experience a secondary loss, as friends and family drift away, unable to cope with the intensity of the grief or unsure how to offer support.

We founded STAK.life (Stefan’s Acts of Kindness) in February 2024, in memory of our son Stefan, who died by suicide in March 2022 at just 15 years old.

The People Behind the Squares

Watch the official Kent Speak Their Name Film Video.

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Nothing could have prepared us for the raw power of that moment, seeing Stefan’s name and photo alongside others who had died by suicide.

Stefan was full of kindness, humour and love, but he was also bullied for being autistic, and like so many, he was failed by services in Kent, and the world did not give him the understanding or safety he deserved.

This is why in September 2024, we found ourselves standing in Victoria Park, Portsmouth, at the unveiling of the Hampshire & Isle of Wight Speak Their Name Memorial Quilt. Among the names and faces sewn into that quilt was our beautiful boy Stefan, as a family member had lovingly completed a square in memory of him.

Nothing could have prepared us for the raw power of that moment, seeing Stefan’s name and photo alongside others who had died by suicide. It was deeply emotional, heart-wrenching, yet profoundly moving. In the shared silence of that gathering, surrounded by people who understood the depths of grief we carried, we weren’t alone. For the first time in a long time, we felt held, not by platitudes or empty reassurances, but by a community of people who knew the weight of this loss.

Standing there, we realised something vital: this quilt wasn’t just a memorial.

It was a promise that Stefan and all those who died would be seen. That they would be remembered. That their stories would not be swallowed by stigma or silence.

We had vowed that Stefan would never be forgotten, and we knew others longed for that same assurance. A place where grief, love, and memories could live together, stitched into something that speaks not just of loss, but of enduring connection, courage, and hope.

In that moment, we knew that we just had to lead a Kent Speak Their Name Memorial Quilt

Making it Happen

In January 2025, we started the project with generous donations of materials from the local community and with help from many wonderful volunteers, who we could not have done without.

We distributed packs throughout the county, containing guidelines for creating a square, safety advice, and essential materials such as fabric, ribbon, and threads. We hosted twelve quilt workshops across various locations in Kent, providing a safe space for individuals who had lost a loved one to come together, a place where stories could be shared, where grief could be spoken aloud, and where people could feel understood by others who truly got it.

Each square has been crafted with love, pain, stories, and memories. Together, they form a collective tapestry of remembrance. This quilt is more than fabric and thread; it is a visual expression of our grief and our love. It makes our emotions visible and says, without words, that we and our loved ones were here. That we matter. That we should be seen. We lay our stories bare in the hope that no one else will ever have to endure this kind of loss and pain, and that by speaking their names, we keep their light alive.

We later gathered people from every corner of Kent, families, friends, and loved ones bound by shared loss.

From that powerful moment of coming together, we created a short film: a tender snapshot of the love, grief, and hope stitched into every square. It captures the very heart of this project, the voices behind the names, and the message the quilt speaks so loudly and clearly.

In September 2025, the quilt was unveiled at the Baton of Hope before joining quilts from twelve other counties. Together, they filled the halls of Parliament with a bold and undeniable truth that every square represents a life cut short, a family shattered, and a call for change that can no longer be ignored.

Now, the quilt is on its journey across Kent, finding homes in spaces where people can come close to its stories, where they can see the love sewn into every stitch, feel the weight of each name, and understand the depth of every loss. It not only honours those we’ve lost to suicide, but compassionately reaches out to those struggling, reminding them they are not alone. Through it all, with love, with courage, we will continue to speak their names.

Read the BBC News articles